_my love for you;

no music no life....

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

as.... no music no life....
listen to some good songs....
can make myself feeling better....
and...might make myself forgot about those ''things'' for temporary....

http://profile.imeem.

com/OcuHN/playlist/fberMxgM/

-Sign Off @ 7:32 AM :)

smile...????

Monday, February 26, 2007

after the accident.... i dont know how to smile anymore.....
even my friends' jokes are very funny.... but then.... i still dont have the mood to smile......
when you saw i am smiling... i am not truely smile.... just to comfort others....

everytimes... i tell my friends... if you wanna cry... then just cry it out... i will accompany you....
but then.... this time... i cant comfort myself with this way.... i hold the feeling.... and just try to forget about it with doing many many things... just made myself busy.... but i also cant forget about it....

i cried... for my studies....
i have missed up soo many classes and i cant even follow the class....
i cried... for my mom....
the first time i cried in front of my family was the day that my mom having accident.... i afraid i will loose my mom.... i dont wanna live in a incomplete family.... as... no mom and dad.... what for i live in the world...?????
i cried... for my results....
the first year i cried for my results.... that i cant imagine that i can get this kind of results..... the most worst result i got.....

sooo.... how i force myself to smile truely from the heart...????
perhaps....
sometimes....

-Sign Off @ 10:14 AM :)

sTrEsS......

sTrEsS.....
the same title again....
=.=''' ______

i am feeling much more stress are getting closer to me now....
after the accident..... the stress are like.... getting more and more... and seem didnt reduce even a little bit...
after the accident... my mom cant move too much...as she is a patient... sooo... it's my turns to do all those houseworksss.... but then..... haizzz.... now only i knew that.... my mom is a 'superbwoman...'

i have missed up many extra classes and tuitions this few weeks... as my mom's leg cant move for temporary.... and my dad is working in outstation.... and conclusion is... nobody fetch me to here and there.... and that time.... i really wanna.....[arrgghhhh!!!!].....
i really hope that the government can make a new dicision... that is---- 16 can drive a car.... if this comes true.... then i need not to missed up soo many classes.... but.... the government set it as---- 17 only can drive a car.... haizz... have to wait for another 1 year....
just now... i went to my account tuition.... i cant even understand what the teacher teaching..... (teacher.. i am not ''sengaja'' absent and dont go for the replacement.... i really dont have car to go.... teacher... please forgive me....) by the way... i will try to chase up as fast as i can..... i try my best.... teacher...

nowadays... i have to do all those houseworkss.....
wakes up early in the morning.... then sweep the floor.... later get ready to school....
after the school.... come back... keep clothes from outside.... get ready to tuition and extra classes....
finished tuition... come back... get ready the ingredients for grandma to cook.... then mop the floor...
after that... turn on the washing machine.... and fold the clothes....
finally.... i can do my homeworksss dy....
everyday keep on going....
every night i sleep on 3 am or something....
sometimes i just fall asleep on the table.... as i really very tired....
every morning i wake up at 5.30am or sometimes 6am....
i am tired...
even sometimes i fall asleep in some teachers class....
but what should i do??? i am the eldest one....
sometimes... i need my sister help.... but then she shouted at me.... *@&#^$%
eg.... i just told her to put those dirty clothes into the washing machine.... she shouted me back... :'' you cant do it aarrrr..??? you didnt see i am doing my homeworks arrr..????'' Oh My Godddd!!!!! what type of attitude was she having..???? i havent scold her yet.... she shouted at me first..... i did so many things.... i also didnt say anything.... i just told you to do such an easy task... you shouted at me... i really wanna fight with her that time.... but... i respect my mom.... ok.... i ''swallow'' it....

Science classes......
Physics + Biology + Chemistry + Additional Mathematics + Modern Mathematics + Malay + Chinese + English + EST + History + Moral = 11 subjects
Extra subjects......
Account + Chinese Literature = 2 subjects
SUM = 11 subjects + 2 subjects = 13 subjects
how i suffer...????? those stress and pressure are getting more and more....
these subjects are not easy to study...*for me*... and i am not those talented people....
would i suffer this kind of life for 2 years...????? do i have the ''stamina''...????
# i am confuse and blurr here.....#

_____what have i did in my previous life...??????________
_____why should i suffer like this.......?????________

--------@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@--------------

-Sign Off @ 8:47 AM :)

nice song...

Thursday, February 22, 2007

errmmm...
this song is nice...
but i dont know what the song's name and who are the two singer....
hehezz.... sooo...
just enjoy this song...

-Sign Off @ 4:42 AM :)

聆聽世界

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

-Sign Off @ 10:49 AM :)

hahax... Yeahhhhh!!!!!!

Yeah..!!!!! hahax..... so happy....!!!!!!
finally i know how to blog songs..... YEAH!!!!!!!! hahax...!!!!!!!!
(maybe somebody will think i was mad... XD... [even somebody will say... ''cheh!!! blog songs only mah.... easy job laaa...'' but for me... {*a low IQ & EQ and stupid people didnt know IT very well mah....} so felt very happy looo.... hahax...] lolx...
Hehezz... thanks that person who teach me....
*Thanks very very very very muchhhhhh......*
#although i dont know whether he notice my blog or not laa.... i just wanna thanks him again....#
! please leave a comment...if you see this...! hehex...
aiyaaa....!!!! i forgot to ask the person intro leh.... aiyaaa...!!!! really stupid and big big big sotong laaaa..... aikkkss.s... haizzz....
aaiyaaa... never mind laa... it just over laa....
hfmmm.... yooo.... many homeworks leh....
Yeah...!!!!! tomorrow my friend come and accompany me finish those homeworkssssss....... Yaeh!!!!!! hahax..... do homeworksssssss also have to accompany by friend.... lolx.....XD....

hehezzzz.....

-Sign Off @ 9:34 AM :)

Reflection...

-Sign Off @ 8:37 AM :)

When You Say Nothing at All

-Sign Off @ 8:14 AM :)

sun burn....

Monday, February 19, 2007

yoooo....
many of us caught sun burn dy.....
my cousin laaa... my friends laaa... me laaa...
yoooo.... so painful...you know...
my cousin and i... very serious.... ''脫皮'' aaa.....
and we became very very dark dyy....
yooo.... ..... ....
my cousin and i... have a stupid + crazy thinking....
we decided to go to England for 1 year.....
then we will become very very very very very fair....
even fairer than when we was a baby....
lolx.... hahax.... crazy leh....
hmmm.... i think... the exchange student will more more serious than us laa.a...
cause he came from Iceland.... a place that full of ice....[i guess laaa...].... then when Malaysia having raining season... he also said hot and he cant stand with this weather dy.... then that day we went to cross-country... sure he will get sun burn dy.... aiyaaa... dont bother about him laaa...
my cousin so pity... he back almost all also ''脫皮'' dy... he said when he bathing.... his back was so pain... like something had burn his back.... yooooo.... pity leh.... and myself also pity tooo....XD.... my face almost 70% ''脫皮''.... yooo... soo painful..!!!!!! first few days... i just felt my face became red and red & became hot and hoter....... but i didnt know that my face will become sooo serious.... when i washed my face... i felt that my face was sooo pain when touch by the water... then only i knew that... my face_____dy.... T.T + :'(....... sooo pain.... yoooo.....

-Sign Off @ 9:14 AM :)

what a stupid, shit.....

Saturday, February 17, 2007

OH MY GODDDD!!!!!!!
what a STUPID and SHIT st johners they are..?????

15-02-2007..
this is the cross country's day of my school... principal and those teachers...(can say they are stupid... you will know what happen next...) decided to held it outside school area... they decided to do it in a park...that far away from our school.... lolx.... have to go there by bus... and those bus drivers drove damn sloww.... lolx...like turtle moving.... hehez..
reached there at about 9 something...(of course on the day time laa...) only those boyz start to run... lolx... what the hell...??? they are the first group that arrived there.... stupid teacher playing with the time.... (those teachers treat us very ''GOOD'' 1...) {''FANTASTIC GOOD"} ..... the sun didnt shine brightly... they wont let us run....[ see.. how "GOOD" our teachers are...] *i really wanna throw some bad words to them dy.... #but i wont do this laa... i just scolded them with bad words in my heart.... hehezz... damn crazy lor me... many people just shouted them(bad words) out....
after completed the run... that the times for us to rest.... waoo... people mountain people sea.... cant even find my friends out... hahax.... 1 thing is use now... deng deng deng..!!!! ''handphone...''
although those teachers said cant bring hp... i still bring... {XD... so naughty...} then we contact each other loo... the most excited thing was-- i was using hp in front of those teachers... hahax... geng leh..??? hehez... those teacher watching at me... and i also dont bother about them... lolx...( i wonder how i did it....)
yooo... those teachers aaa.... VERY ENJOY there.... they PICNIC there.... what the hell??? we went to run there... and they just went to enjoy there... what the stupid teachers they are??? of course nobody will run.... not definately no people run laa... yet just few will run loo... OH MY GOD...!!!! damn shine there... then those stupid teachers called us to the field on about 12 NOON..!!!!! ooohhhh!!! damn SHIT!!!!! 12 NOON!!!!! as i said dy... they are ''FANTASTIC GOOD'' enough....called us sat on the field at 12 NOON!!!!! and they just sat inside the camp.... what the hell laa!!!!! dont even have a tree for us.... then few minutes later... some people cant stand with this kind of weather dy... they went under some big trees and cool themselves.... but then... those mad teachers came and shouted at them and said UNFAIR to others students....
''ooohhh.... teachers.... you know ''UNFAIR'' this word aaarrr???? if you knew UNFAIR this word... then why you wanna sit inside the camp???? come out and sat with us under the bright sun laaa....!!!!!!! stupid, shit teachers!!!!!!
later.... my turn.... i also cant stand with those weather dy.... then my friend lend me her mp3.... then i looked like a mad people there.... i sang there.... (ooohhh.... impossible....) i sang like a mad people.... didnt use the correct way to sing.... and many people turned and staring at me... then i said '' just thought i am mad.... and have to make your ear suffer....'' and they laughed... XD... i really crazy that time.... i dont know how to comfort myself dy.... so i did this kind of stupid things....
ooohhh.... made me mad dy.... yaaa... the exchange student's face was soooooo red.... looked many blood on his face... of course not killed by somebody laa.... just because of the weather.... i think he got sun burn dy.... as i also got sun burn.... not only few of us.... yet many of us... also got sun burn.... among my friends... i am the most serious laa... but not that serious as the exchange student.... he is more more serious than me.... my sister told me-- after i completed the run.... my face is almost alike the exchange student dy looo... cause very very red... she said... but not like blood laa.... lolx.... ( no wonder why many people staring at me.... even those stupid teachers...)
our school canteen got selling foods there.... but then... it was a little and was cost RM3.... killed us meh...??? more over it was not enough... then 1 of my friends called her mom for ''rescue''... waoooo.... her mom really a super superb mommy.... we just phoned her... then within 10 minutes.... her mommy arrived dy.... waa... that time... we felt like we were saved.... sooooo lucky.... and also happy...!!!!! then i gave mine to my sister laaa... as she didnt eat anything on breakfast.... then we enjoyed our food very very very much.... lolx... even my sis's friends asked her where she buy the food.... hehez.... we bluff them ''there at there looo....'' my sis kept on smiling there... our food are much more nice and great.... and cost only RM3.30.... just over 30 sen.... then can 'fulfill' our stomach... my cousin told me that he bought the school foods and was not enough.... lolx... pity yaa...

aiiyyaaa.... why suddenly went to soooo far away from the title dy de???
okok.... back to the title...
yaaa... those st johners aaa... really damn stupid and shit 1.... even though i am a st johner also.... but i didnt duty on this day....
the most isolated place dont even have a st johner there.... yet... the most public place was so many st johners there... what the hell laa???? this year leadership really very very very shit.!!!!! i prefer last year leadership.... choo, khe li, they all.... they are sooooo perfect... and choo is the most good leader i have seen before....[choo... praising you aaa.... happy???] XD... really laa... choo is good enough....
ok... the story was liked that....
that time... i was running.... ermmm.... not running laaa... ''walking'' laaa...hehez...
on my way.... i saw a student was injured.... and of course... i should go and inform the teachers or get some help from the st johners right??? i went along the road... and i didnt even see a st johner is standing at there.... i was sooo _____.... argghhhh!!!!! i cant do anything as i was not on duty and i was not in uniform.... sooo how..?? i continued to run and find teachers... along the road i cant even see somebody standing beside.... just those students running there.... i ran about half way.... then finally i found a teacher.... i brought the teacher to the place where i met the student.... and i was really angry that time... and i just told the teacher... i cant even find a st johner... then the teacher said never mind... let she be with her.... ok, fine... i continued my way.... then... at the most public place.... i saw my seniors.... the leader.... i shouted at them.... i dont bother whether they are my seniors or not...[dont have moral hor..??? but that time... really___...argghhh!!!!!] that is your responsibility to give the fisrt aiding.... if not... why teachers call you all on duty..???? i straight away shouted at them.... ''here you are...!!! the most isolated place dont even have a st johner and here... there are 5 or 6 over here....!!!! do you know anybody injured at the back..????'' then i dont bother about them dy.... i think they must thought i was mad.... cause suddenly i shouted at them like that.... *i dont bother they thought i was mad or not laa.... but it's a truth.... #at the end... i dont know they got go and gave first aid or not....
what the hell laa....????? be a st johner... become like that...???
i dont know how they can pass with this kind of behaviour......
and i also dont know how i pass last year.... i dont think i did well in the exam... as i was panicked that time when i saw the doctor.... and i almost forgot all those method dy.... luckily i could remember them at the end.... and i was the kind that luckily pass... my friend, fiona... who was really put in much efford.... and of course she pass very well laaa... but now... she went to k.l. dy.... left me alone in st john.... yooo.... fiona... i miss you sooo much.... hope you see this... then contact me a.s.a.p..... last year many people pass laa... the most ''lc'' people also pass..... aiyooo.....

___________(finish)_____________

-Sign Off @ 10:39 AM :)

Happy Chinese New Year....

Yeahhhh!!!!!!!
Chinese New Year luuu.....
So happy....{cause can get angpau lu...}
and a little bit sad laa...{so many _____ things happen...}
and a little bit dissapointed laa....{the first year didnt go back Malacca celebrate chinese new year with grandpa and grandma....}

ermmm.... kinda boring...
cant go anywhere.... but... luckily... my cousin are coming here to celebrate chinese new year with me.... yeah!!!!! so happy...!!!!! ermm... dont know my grandma will come or not... if she come... then more happy..... hehezz...

aiyooyoooo... people celebrate Chinese New Year... me also celebrate it tooo.....
why other peoples celebrate it with relaxx feeling.... but then....i celebrate it with lots of stress.....?????? those teachers aarrgghghhh!!!!! give us soooooooooooooo many homeworksssssss...... then after the holidays... we have to face the monthly test..... OH MY GOD!!!!!!! other peoples play during new year... but what about me???? i was ''racing'' with the time.... tried to finish up it as fast as possible.... but those homeworksssss seem like cant finish them at all... even though i did it till late night..... :'(.... helppppp!!!!!!!! i really wanna throw all those homeworksssssss to the rubbish bin dy!!!!!!! made me mad dy laaa.... especially add maths...... (arrrggghhhhh!!!!!)

-Sign Off @ 9:45 AM :)

damn BAD newz....

Monday, February 12, 2007

story began....
told by my sister....

this noon.... my mom was fetching my sister and her friend to school.... their class was started at 12.30pm...
my mom was the driver... and my mom drove so slowly and carefully....
then suddenly.... ''KAAABOOOMMMM''.....
the incident was so likely to the incident of the Taiwan famous actress, Xu Wei Lun....
my mom's car dont know why suddenly crushed over the middle line.... and... went to the other side of the road.... then ''KAABOOOMMM'' again.... another car came and crushed my mom's car.... my mom's car... proton iswara.... so small... sure will hit the person who sat inside... and my mom is the most serious 1.... my sister badly injured... and the friend just soft injury... luckily she's not that serious... or not... i also dont know what will happen next...

my sister said that was like a horrible nightmare.... that she was crying when she told me all this things.... and i cried also.... when i saw she cried like that.... then she turn to laugh at me for 5 second like that...[cause she said me crazy... that i cried also even i didnt involved in the accident....] then turned to cry again... i knew why she cried so sadly... as the incident really very frightened... especially for a girl that just 13 years old...

-Sign Off @ 1:45 AM :)

stupid.....idiot

Friday, February 9, 2007

i knew....i am
stupid...crazy...idiot...mad...
but then...
you all cant treat me like this....

ok...i knew...
you all_____(~haizz... dont feel like wanna mention it~)
.....
..........
................
......................

dont have the mood to write it out anymore.....

.....................................(finish)

-Sign Off @ 9:10 PM :)

finally, i.....

Wednesday, February 7, 2007

finally, i.... broke down....
as i faced many social problemsss....
made me headache....
made my brain interrupt....
haizzz.... all those things aaa.....
really____[haizzz... dont wanna mention it laa...]
......(finish)

finally, i.... cried....
not for my friendship....
not for my partner....
not for my family....
not for my beloved pet....
not for my pocket money....
yet....
for my study....
for my homeworkssss....
for my exam....
for my theory....
for my STRESS....!!!!!!!!!
........(finish)

-Sign Off @ 2:07 AM :)

31-01-2007

Thursday, February 1, 2007

31/01/2007

lolx.... today.... my school came an exchange student (AFS).... then principal plan to set him to our class.... my classmates were so happy and crazy about it... espeacially those girls.... {yet not me....} hmmm.... that guy.... handsome looo.... blue big eyes and yellow-brownish hair.... cute.... and he's a little bit shy looo.... his voice sooo sooo small..... and softtt.....
not only those girls like to surround him.... yet the boyz tooo..... lolx.... see how welcome is he.... hahax.... of course there must be very very noisy.... gossip here... gossip there... then got some teacher not that happy with us.... know why??? they said my class are too noisy.... too crowded.... this laaa... that laa... haizzz.... as a conclusion.... they just wanna..... {haizz.... need not to mention it laaa.... as everybody should know....}
however.... that guy said dont want.... then my girls classmate like a mad people.... hahax.... lolx.... that guy looks like a ''big brother...'' wherever he go..... always got at least 4 or 5 people around him.... hahax....
ok.... another topic.... nowadays... the homeworks is higher than a mountain.... longer than a river.... used so long time to finish it.... yesterday... i just slept for 2 hours.... other than that.... doing homework.... now.... it's not a schooling dayz..... yet a homework-ing dayz..... lolx.... haizzz.... did those homework till feel like going to hell..... XD.... notes, peka, exercise, work books,..... .... ... cant even list out here.....

haizz... today got the add maths monthly test tooo.... i just knew how to do the 1st question....out of 6 question.... haizzz.... dont know how mark i will get.... maybe an big big egg.... [hahax... i havent eat egg for a quite long time....] lolx.XD....

-Sign Off @ 6:46 AM :)